Here are some examples of things you can say, expressions you can use when exposed to her shadows:
- I am free to do what I want!
- My actions belong to me.
- How someone responds to my actions is not my responsibility, it is theirs.
- I am free and independent!
- I am in control of my life!
- No one has the right to blame me!
- If your energy becomes toxic to me, I might take distance from you or investing my time or energy in you.
- Taking care of your insecurities is your job not mine
- I don’t give you the permission to sabotage my highs! If you do try to sabotage or poison my joy, I will probably stay away from you or and cut off connection
- If your presence becomes toxic to me, I will stay away from you
- May the spirit protect me from toxic people. If you are toxic to me, may the spirit protect me from you.
- Don’t sabotage my connections with other women or other men
- Don’t pressure me, don’t submit me to demands, don’t give me threats or ultimatums – If you do, I will take distance from you
- If you go into blame and drama, I will probably stay away from you
- Don’t blame me or attack me! I can’t open up to you if you keep threaten me
- I am not here to fix you, rescue you or educate you, that’s your responsibility
- If you want my help for something, ask me clearly and I will decide if I want to help or not
- I owe you nothing
- If I see you, it’s because I want to
- Don’t give me threats or ultimatums, that just sends me away from you
- I am not interested in arguing with you
- I am not interested in being in drama with you
- Giving me some vague hints doesn’t work for me! If you want something make it clear to me.
- Your life is your life, not mine
- What you do with your time and energy is none of my business
- The energetic or emotional choices you make are your choices, your mine
- How you perceive situations is your responsibility, not mine
- I am unaffected by you disconnecting – If you disconnect, I will equally and instantly disconnect from you and direct my energy to other women
- I am not interested in exposing my tribe, friends, women I am connected to, to any of your shadow or trigger outbreaks – If you try to engage me in public I will probably withdraw myself from you
- I am not interested in playing your games
- If you want something, be clear, consistent, coherent. Mixed or contradictory signals or hints don’t work with me.
- Don’t try domesticating me – I won’t compromise my truth to try accommodating your needs
Some questions for you:
Did you use any of these in the past?
What happens when you use expressions like these?
What’s the impact on her?
How does the use of these expressions make you feel?
What is your own favorite way to set up your limits?
How good are you at setting up your own boundaries with her?
What else could you say that you’re not saying yet?