55 SHADOW ATTACKS SHE MIGHT PROJECT ON YOU

ATTACK SHADOWS – PROJECTED SHADOWS

  1. ANGER
  2. ATTACKING
  3. BEING BITCHY
  4. CONFUSING
  5. MISREPRESENTING
  6. BLAMING
  7. COMPLAINING
  8. CRITICIZING
  9. RESENTING
  10. DEPRIVING
  11. BEING UNGRATEFUL
  12. IGNORING YOU
  13. CUTTING YOU OFF
  14. EXCLUDING
  15. EMOTIONAL INSTABILITY
  16. BEING TRIGGERED
  17. SABOTAGING
  18. MISLEADING
  19. LYING
  20. SARCASM
  21. BETRAYING
  22. CHEATING
  23. MANIPULATING
  24. ARGUING
  25. DISTORTING
  26. DENYING
  27. STORY PROJECTING
  28. EMOTIONAL THREAT
  29. GOSSIPING
  30. SELF ENTITLEMENT
  31. SELF RIGHTEOUSNESS
  32. PRIVACY INVASION
  33. HARASSING
  34. EMOTIONAL HARASSMENT
  35. SURPRISE ATTACKS
  36. EMOTIONAL SHIFTS
  37. EMOTIONAL INTENSITY
  38. DRAMA
  39. NARCISSISM
  40. RESTRAINING
  41. DOMESTICATING
  42. CONTROLLING
  43. MICROMANAGING

SOFT SHADOWS – INTERNALIZED SHADOWS

  1. VICTIMIZATION
  2. SELF PITY
  3. INSECURITY
  4. NEEDINESS
  5. SADNESS
  6. CONFUSION
  7. DEPRESSION
  8. BEING OFF
  9. DRAMATIZING
  10. GENERALIZING
  11. JUMPING TO CONCLUSIONS
  12. AVOIDANCE

You notice that I separated these shadows in two categories because some can be attacks while others can be internalized.

The impact on how you feel is totally different.

A typical internalized shadow is “Sadness”.

A typical externalized shadow is “Anger”

QUESTIONS FOR YOU

Which of these shadows does your current partner express?

What are her 3 core shadows?

What about previous relationships? What shadows do you see?

How doe the expressions of these shadows impact on you?

How do these shadows impact on your couple?

What is your best response to these shadow attacks? Analyze them one by one

Are her shadows internalized or externalized?

Do you recognize in her other shadows that are not in this list?

What are your 3 core shadows?

How do you intend to shift or integrate these behaviors?