Here are some examples of things women do that might piss you off and get you in reactive mode.
Recognize any of these?
- She spies on you, goes into your email account, facebook private messages and totally invades your privacy.
- She gossips about you.
- Her friends check you out and report to her.
- She talks to your friends behind your back and conspires to manipulate or hurt you.
- She steals your ideas or creations and makes people believe that they are hers.
- She is emotionally unpredictable – She shifts from extremely happy to extremely sad with simple innocent triggers.
- She creates drama and conflict out of nothing.
- She is emotionally intense all the time and never relaxes.
- She is unhappy and finds ways of blaming you for that.
- She builds up stories and assumes they are true.
- She is explosive and communicates in very emotional untamed ways.
- She is packed with baggage and traumas from her past love life.
- She is demanding and requires full unlimited attention when she’s around.
- She shuts down sexually to you to punish you or just because she feels like it.
- She disqualifies and sabotages what you have.
- She says she wants intimacy, sex and connection but doesn’t provide emotional safety.
- She asphyxiates your space by cutting you from the things you need and love.
- She attacks your friends and is rude to them.
- She feels challenged by any woman who approaches you.
- She is extremely sexual with other men in front of you to trigger you and make you jealous.
- She misleads you by telling you she wants something when in fact she is manifesting the exact opposite.
- Her words, intentions and promises don’t match her actions.
- She wants to be number one in your life but doesn’t give you that position in her life.
- She lies to you about her sex life and her lovers.
- She manipulates you and plays games by getting you trapped in situations that work against you and hurt you.
- She attacks your core qualities to weaken the sexual attraction you create in other women towards you.
- She negates your core qualities, skills and life experience to make you weaker.
- If you don’t do what she wants or contradict her, she makes vindictive choices to hurt you.
- She does everything she can to open you up and then attacks you.
- She asks you to share your feelings and freaks out or totally disconnects when you do.
- She argues and systematically talks over you.
- She is often ungrateful for the gifts she receives from you.
- She rejects your gifts them and sabotage her ability to receive them in the future.
- She betrays you and then wonders why you don’t trust her.
- She unconsciously sabotages many precious sacred moments by expressing untamed emotions.
- She is highly insecure about her body.
- She feels threatened by other women’s beauty and sexiness.
- She enters in competitive games with other women.
- She plays nasty tricks on you, knows she was hurtful but never apologizes or apologizes months later.
- She uses her weapons and manipulation on you but instantly reacts and attacks you when you or anyone else uses the same tactics on her.
- Rather than taking responsibility for her own shadows, she blames you and criticizes you incessantly for what doesn’t work in your connection.
- She is totally unfair when judging a story, her behavior or your behavior.
- She gives a totally distorted picture of reality to her friends to appear as the victim and good girl to them.
- She has double standards which means being ok with her doing some things and freaking out when you mirror the same behavior.
- She gives up on dialogue or the relationship as soon as she is faced with a disturbing truth or disturbing emotion about herself.
- She avoids telling the truth by playing being offended when asked simple questions.
- She stays in the upset or offended zone to trigger guilt in you.
- She says she is sorry and does it all over again without changing her behavior.
- She goes in sudden physically and emotionally abusive explosive behaviors.
- She consciously ignores you in front of her friends to make them believe she is on top.
- When she has a new lover and just wants to take a break out of the relationship, she finds a detail, triggers a fight or makes up a story to get out.
- She laughs at her own flaws and shadow experiments but is totally unforgiving when you make a small mistake or play with your own shadows.
- She says she wants to be committed to be together but gives up and leaves as soon as a challenge hits her.
- She isolates you from other potential lovers and friends and then cuts you off or deprives you from love and sex.
- If you face a conflict, she will be cruel and do anything she can to hurt you.
- She submits you to pressure, demands, threatens you and gives you ultimatums.
- She is constantly seeking attention from you and everyone else. She has this deep urge to always be the center of attention.
- She tries to emotionally asphyxiate you by bombarding you with her hatred.
- She starts on a project with you and then almost instantly poisons it and sabotages its chances of success.
- She gets really loud and curses a lot but gets offended the moment you raise your voice.
- She goes and has sex with other men and uses that energy to attack you or exclude you.
- She is evasive, doesn’t give you clear answers, doesn’t reply to your questions or your messages.
- She sends you message questions but abandons or ignores your chat as soon as you respond or asks her follow up questions.
- She is self defeating for your couple, destroys or breaks up one moment and wants to be together for life the next.
- She goes through emotional extremes and provides little emotional continuity or energetic stability.
- She abandons virtual chats, disconnects, doesn’t invest energy in them, doesn’t reply to your questions or ignores your messages but reacts strongly if you don’t reply to her messages within the hour.
- She is cryptic and mysterious in the way she communicates, doesn’t state her intentions, isn’t clear or doesn’t reply to your questions. She plays communication games.
- She avoids or ignores your deep questions and stays in chit chat mode instead.
- She interprets what you say, misrepresents it, modifies it, gives it her own spin, exaggerates it. She eventually tells you that you said certain things that in fact you never said.
- She puts you down by saying things like “You are bad for me”, “You are not worth it, “I don’t want to be your lover”, “Being with you is a big mistake”, etc.
- She attacks you ruthlessly when you do or say something she disagrees with but doesn’t thank you much when you get it right.
- She complains and blames you endlessly.
- She expresses intense emotional threats and puts you under strong pressure to get you to do what she wants.
Which examples do you recognize?
Any other examples you are exposed to that I didn’t mention?
What’s the number one thing in her that triggers you?
What’s the impact on your being?
How does that impact your relationship?
What’s your best tactic to deal with this?
Let’s get this clear!
My goal here is not to universally blame women!
The examples I mention above are isolated examples that men are exposed to.
The fact that some women express some of these behaviors doesn’t that all women do.
The reason I encourage men to look at this si to identify exactly the core shadow patterns that trigger them.
Once you know what these patterns, recognize them in your daily life, it is way easier to identify the best possible response.
The final goal is to create deeper, more powerful connections with the women men love!