Monday, March 23, 2009
How to be rejection proof
How to be rejection proof
Here is an example
What is the force you need to be rejection proof? Take this example: You are a woman. You like a guy. You ask him out. He says "no, thank you". This single response impacts on your life, self esteem and future behavior. Because of this one rejection, you might never ask a guy out again! Can you see the dynamics? It's crazy!
One guy! One rejection! You build a mind frame around it which can create a prison of energies for the next 20 years of your life!
That's one situation where extra power and understanding would definitely help:
"Dating is a battle field!" of course it is initiated by love but the context in which it happens is highly competitive. In fact, it's more competitive than a martial art's dojo. It is literally a psychic battle for power and love.
When a guy rejects you. Here is what happens: You say "Peace, love".
He answers back with an attack! It's not conscious but this is what it is!!!! His rejection is an attack on your conquering power, your desire, your life, etc. Sometimes he is well intended and does not mean it. Sometimes he will do something consciously simply to make you feel terrible.
If you go back home and say something like: "I'll never ask a guy out again!" That's it! He wins! You loose! When you loose, it's your whole destiny line which gets blocked.
In fact you let this single emotional reaction from one person decide the way you will feel about guys for the next 20 years!!! or even more.
Come on! His reaction has nothing to do with love. It has to do with power. His mind wins over yours. His emotion impacts on your mind and grows in a cluster of negative energy. Can you see the dynamics?
Now, here is the deal: Extra power gives you the energy to protect your mind space! Your thoughts are more important than his thoughts. A guy will not stop you. Not one rejection, not 1000!
You see why we talk about power. Because no one has the right to kill your dignity! It's very simple. Your inner power has precisely this ability: To give you natural resources to preserve your mind space.
The underlying dynamics of rejection
There is a fundamental misunderstanding about the dating scene. When you get rejected, it has nothing to do with love. It is a power mechanism. It is battle between two energies.
The first energy is your desire, life force, will power.
The second energy is a minute emotion projected in your mind space. This minute emotion is a mind pattern. It says something like: "I don't like you and I don't want to go out with you".
This negative emotion is projected by someone else.
Here is what will happen if you don't show your power at that moment: This minute negative emotion will take root in your mind. It will grow, make "babies" in your mind. Before you notice it, you are taken into a stream of negative thoughts and beliefs which block your mind and simply kill your life force. One person's rejection did generate a limit in your mind which was not there before.
Here is what happens now if you express your fighting power in rejection situations.
The first step: You go prepared. You have an emotional strategy to deal with rejection.
The second step: You react straight away. You simply do not tolerate any negative emotion to come inside. A battle goes on. If you loose, it can eventually kill your life force. Don't tolerate someone else's negative emotion in your mind. Kill it!
I know these words are hard and direct. This is what it is. Put it in the balance. This is about your mind space, life force, power and energy. When someone rejects you, it's a simple battle for power. It is a measuring of who is stronger psychically. If you let someone else's negative emotion impact on you, you loose the battle. Simple!
Life force is more precious than money
The question is: "why is this happening?", "Why are energies conflicting in the first place?", "Why would someone have such a negative impact by rejecting you?"
The answer is simple: You challenged their space first. Imagine, someone is having a drink. You go and talk to that person with the intention of building up something. Your energy is a challenge, intrusion or opening in their mind space. Their rejection is nothing personal. It is a defense mechanism which says: "I have other project in mind right now and I will be tough on you".
It's part of your instinctual nature to measure your level of power when meeting someone. Competition is a natural instinctual response.
This is why it happens. Of course, as a human being your emotions are more complex, but the basic mechanism is still the same. A rejection has nothing to do with love. It is a mutual measure of power.
If you let rejection impact on your mind, it simply kills your life force. Your defense instinct gives you various options:
You can fight back: "I was just kidding anyway. You are not worth it!"
You can leave and step out of that person's zone of influence.
You can challenge other's by fighting back or measuring yourself with them.
You can "reject rejection" and insist until you find an opening in the person who rejected you.
You can ask for support and call a friend
You can let rejection bounce on the surface of your mind and simply laugh about it.
I don't know about you but this last option truly seduces me. That's the one I want, don't you?
Imagine rejection simply bouncing on the surface of your mind and you simply laughing about it.
How can this happen? It can happen because you are prepared and you have other sources of power which do not depend on your "rejecter's" validation.
Trust and confidence is built inside. They are rooted deep in your mind and stabilize your emotional space.
These sources of power are your true instinctual power. You can as well get other sources of support. For instance, when you get rejected, pick up your mobile and call a close friend to tell what happened. Your friend will give you validation for your action and strengthen your inner power.
These are all power dynamics. Love is there as well of course responsible for another set of dynamics.
If you want to get the tools to be rejection proof, you need to gather this inner power and go for it. Remember, it is battle for life force and energy. These are very precious. Give yourself the power tools to protect them.
The first step is accepting and understanding these power dynamics.
Once you realize and see them, it's already 50% of the work which is done. Developing your inner power happens quite naturally once you realize this is what you need. You simply go for it, because your "fighting" power is already present you. Often, you simply don't dare to tap into it or don't really know how to use it. Do you even realize it is already in you?
Waking up your power is an exhilarating feeling. When it happens, it's truly like waking up. You realize it is a freeing force which removes layers of old conditioning, sets you free and ready to face future challenges with fun and excitement. A challenge is only an occasion to train your power. Using your power is fun and exciting.
Be rejection proof!
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