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Sunday, December 13, 2009Help! I don’t want to get emotionally involved! - ARTICLEWhen you feel attraction building up, you can resist it because you are afraid of what will happen next. You believe you can't play the game because you don't want to get involved with a man. You are right with the wanting to stay emotionally free. The best way to respond to attraction and stay emotionally free is to keep your options open. If one guy flirts with you and you start being attracted, you'll get involved if he is your only option. If you have a few men validating you as a woman and you feel them attracted to you, it radically shifts the balance. It gives you power and allows you to stay the center of your life. There are two levels of involvement or commitment: The first one is an emotional one. It is not a conscious decision. You simply notice that you start thinking and feeling for one given guy a lot. The result is usually that you stop searching further. This creates a natural emotional exclusivity in which you start feeling trapped (if it's not what you want). If you want to stay and feel free, the goal is to shift this balance and consciously invest in connections you have with other men. You stay free and non exclusive as long as there are no signs of mutual commitment. If you know where a connection is going and it is not what you want (for instance into a steady committed relationship) it is your right to stay free and non committed. The second level of commitment by the way is when two persons consciously agree to be exclusive with each other and not date any one else. If you don't want to be exclusive and keep your freedom, simple: light date a few men at the same time. Is this okay? 100% yes!!! Times are changing. If in the early stages of dating, if you rely on just one guy, there are always chances for you to get disappointed because you have too high expectations. It is okay to keep your options open and behave like a happy single until you really want to commit yourself to someone. Being single is okay! It is more than okay! It is great! What matters is that it fits with what you want and what you need. You are the one who decides! No one can force you into something which does not feel right for you. When you want to stay free, you have to fight a few battles: · Pressure from society, family and friends to be in a "couple" situation. · Pressure from guys you might be light dating who want to "own you" and in a way, limit your space and freedom. Remember, you own your life! You are the one who decides and there isn't a given model that everyone has to follow. Enjoy your freedom! It is your given right! Labels: stay free ArchivesMay 2005 June 2005 August 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 November 2006 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 May 2009 June 2009 August 2009 October 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010
Help! I don’t want to get emotionally involved! - ARTICLE
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