Here are 5 strategies you could apply:

• Keep trying until; you eventually break through to these persons
• Give them a reason to let you in
• Give up and focus on those who do vlaue you
• Lower your expectations - Don't expect anything!
• Change your social circle or ad a new one!

The goal now is to identify which of these strategies would work best in your unique situation.

that's the battle plan! That's the strategy!

That's the "S" in the "ASA" steps we mentioned earlier

Labels: social power

If you feels challenged within specific social situations, you can apply these 3 steps to solve that challenge:

• Identify the power dynamics - Understand - get a grip of what is truly going on an energy level
• Design a strategy to deal with that challenge
• Apply these strategies - practice!

In other terms:

• Answers
• Strategy
• Action

ASA

Labels: social power

Most of social anxiety is not phobia!

Many people will simply face some type of discomfort when comfronted with specific social situations.

here are some examples that can be challenging:

• Being in a crowd - for instance a game or concert
• Social event where you don't know anyone
• You know people but you feel they don't like you or recognize you
• Public speaking or presentation
• Etc

All these situations have something in common:

You are confronted with othere people's energy or judgement.

The reason you might feel anxiety is because your level of power is not high enough.

If you are comfronted with these situations but your level of inner power is at 100%, you feel fearless, right?

other person's judgements or looks don't touch you becasue you feel confident and trut your own value.

When you feel anxiety it is because your level of power is lower.

the psychic impact of other people on your mind overwers you to a certain extent.

The emotion which is triggered is anxiety which is simply an expression of fear.

anxiety happens because you feel insecure.

So the way to taclke anxiety is to increase your level of power.

You do that by getting power and energy from other sources. You work on your power base and stop trying to get validation from sources you know you won't get it from.

All that happens within the context of life or mind mastery.

Anxiety is irrational. It is a useless emotional reaction that you no longer need.

You can kick that emotion out of your system first by realizing that it's not you and no longer needed.

Then, by increasing your level of personal power as well.

Labels: social power

Another type of validation gap happens when you are having a conversation one on one with someone and that person keeps brininging the attention back to them.

Every time you mention something that concerns you, they bring back the attention to them saying something like "Yes! reminds me of what happened to me last summer..." totally forgetting about your story!

Yes! Frustrating! ;)

This is a lack of social skills from that person and as well lack of interest.

Now, again, it is stupid to want validation from a specific person when you know you won't get it from them.

It takes much more time and energy to educate that specific person rather than finding someone else who is more skills socially and will be able to to validate your story with a keen interest.

Labels: social power

Here is another challenge that you can face:

• Validation gap!

This one happens when you feel the social circle you are in does not value who you are what you do or what you have to offer.

Have you ever been in a social situation and get the feeling that no one cares?

Well, you were facing exactly that: a validation gap.

If you don't get validation from that specific social circle, you might be getting it from othere sources like family, other friends or professional circle.

Labels: social power

Social anxiety means that when you are in social situations you feel a high level of emotional discomfort.

You feel people's judgements, looks, etc.

You respond to them by feeling anxiety.

You can feel this anxiety when being in the situation or before it even happens.

you can compare this to publisg speaking anxiety.

It is the idea of being bomababrded by psychic pressure and not being able to manage that pressure.

This happens for one simple reason; lack of power, psychic power.

You feel that your energy space is invaded and you don't have the emotional resources to protect yourself.

You feel vulnerable.

Anxiety is simply a mild version of fear.

But because of its permanent or recurrring nature, it can create quite a discomfort.

The key is to ad a new level of power to your mind, a few new minds sets and train these new behaviors.

Again, these types of fears are along the same line as stage fright or public speaking anxiety, except that social anxiety refers to a pressure which is usually smaller.

More coming soon

Labels: social power

http://vitalcoaching.com/

Race - Social status - Assets - Personality - Confidence of course - Cultural background - Being too young or too old for a cerayin audience will again play in your favor or against you - Having a vast network of connections is an asset - Attitudes - Similar to personality traits

Labels: social power

Along the line of disqualifiers here is another one that can work either for or against you.

Your ability to easily speak with anyone can be a + if you really master it.

It makes you look socially successful.

Now, if you struggle with opening a set or appear insecure when connecting, this is usually a massive deal breaker and position you instantly in the "needy and insecure" role.

Labels: social power

This is a massive one!

Yes! People can turn you off socially if you don't respect or belong to their "social culture".

Something as simple as a different hand shake can be interpreted in the wrong way.

Yes! It can appear like insignificant but your actions and social attitudes tell a lot about who you are.

Now, some people will enjoy diversity and connect with you precisely because you are different.

This will stimulate them.

Some others will disqualify you in a minute simply because your hair style or clothes does not match their culture.

Labels: social power

It is a matter of understanding what needs to be shifted and making the changes over a few weeks.

Soacial attitudes are learned behaviors and with some practice, you can shift key attitudes so that you don't make basic social "mistakes".

All you have to do to be socially successful is to accept to play the game.

It is usually that simple!

Labels: social power

yes! Appearing needy is a massive turn off socially.

You appear needy when it is obvious that you are lonely or desperate to establish contact.

Labels: social power

Sometimes, it is just the clothes you wear or a ceratin attitude.

Other times it will be lack of confidence or a needy attitude or approach.

Yes! Making friends and winning at the social game can be tough.

In the same way as you can win with the opposite sex, you can as well learn toposition yourself differently in social situations.

Number one strategy is to understand what you are good at and what needs to shift.

Next, you need to have a set of strategies to overcome this challenge + You must do something about it

Labels: social power

Well, it is if you try to play the game with the wrong rules.

You need to be realitic and understand how social life works.

If you feel you express only a fraction of your social potential and for instance people lose interest and don't connect with you, it usually means that you are playing the wrong game in the wrong place or that there is some signinficant disqualifier working against you.

Labels: social power

Here we go. Here is a sample:

• Race

Racial grouping is instinctual and happens all the time. Do we like it? Personaly I don't. I usually connect with people beyond their race and i know that many people do as well. Look for instance at the gang world. race is a major element of belonging, right?

Another example: try to get a CEO position in Japan within a japanese company. I bet it's not easy, right? Yes! It happens a lot.

You might be seen as an outsider simply because you are not from this town or country or have a funny accent.

You can call this social discrimination as well.

It works both ways though. Sometimes it's a + sometimes not depending on the context.

• Social status

Well, yes! Again. The way others look at you will change your ability to connect with new people and make new friends of course. This has to do with social value.

• Assets

A simple example: imagine that you have this big house where you host parties every week end! Of course people will love connecting with you. It is their opening into a new worl of possibilities, right?

• Personality

On top of these personality traits that make you magnetically attractive? Confidence of course. There are many more, like creative power, level of energy, attitude towards life, etc.

• Cultural background

Take the example of religious circles, clubs or societies. Your belonging to a certain group will determine hwo people relate to you.

• Age

Sure! Being too young or too old for a cerayin audience will again play in your favor or against you.

• Network

Having a vast network of connections is like an asset. People will connect with you to connect with that network.

• Attitudes

Similar to personality traits, right? If you are extremely outgoing, enthusiastic, open minded will work better than if you tend to be depressed and unhappy about your life.

This is only a sample. There is more of course ;)

Enjoy!

Labels: social power

Yes! There are such things are socioal disqualifiers in your social life.

if you try to connect with a group of people and create friendships within that circle, elements like race, social status, assets, personality, cultural background, network or attitudes can boost your social connections or destroy your chances of linking with that specific group.

If you feel you can't connect to an individual or group, look at what disqualifies you in their eyes.

one or more elemenst might pop up.

By the way, most of these elements are "discriminative". In other terms, they are unfair.

Simply understand that social connections are mainly instinctual. it is not based on rational decisions.

people click with you instnctually if theyr recognize certains qualities they can relate to.

Labels: social power