Here are examples of things men do that will hurt women.
These are not necessarily gender specific but they are patterns I often observe in men.
If you are a guy and feel you can improve, check them out and see which ones you recognize.
If you are a woman, identifying these patterns might give you some clarity.
I will focus on sex, love and relationship shadows.
- He ignores you when he comes back from work and doesn’t take time to be with you
- He gets easily triggered and emotionally reactive when you offer him some reflection
- He becomes emotionally aggressive if you are not open for sex
- He raises his voice easily and screams at you
- He doesn’t put effort in staying in good shape or neglects grooming and simple hygiene
- He drinks too much when he is out with friends
- He doesn’t give you presence when you are out
- He has no idea how to be romantic
- He doesn’t understand your sexual needs
- He can’t be bothered with communicating or processing when there is tension between you
- He gets very reactive and defensive when you are down
- He is constantly trying to fix you when all you need is to share
- He spends too much time complaining about what’s wrong around him
- He seems to be more interested in mastering technology than understanding how pleasure works in a female body
- He is totally clumsy when it comes to household, doesn’t care, doesn’t participate, considers it’s you job
- He can become physically violent and extremely threatening
- Most of the times he is too tired after a day of work to engage in any form of intimacy with you
- He romantically neglects you because he doesn’t want to put energy into it and doesn’t know how to do it
- He victimizes himself when something goes wrong in his life
- He gets jealous and aggressive as soon as another man approaches you
- He doesn’t take you out and prefers spending time with his friends
If you are a woman and feel hurt by your lover, partner, or husband behavior, what are the shadows that hurt you?
Write them down.
Being to label them honestly and exactly gives you a new understanding edge.
This is the first step in evolving and designing solutions.
Sometimes, educating your partner is the answer.
But you do have many other possible tactics!
Tactics are new tools that allow you to shift from reactive mode to conscious active choice.
I’ll check these tactics soon.
If you are exposed to shadows and want solutions, write them down precisely.
Describe exactly the dynamics of that shadow and what triggers you in them.
I want to hear about them!
Send me a message and I’ll add them to this list.