Once the space is safe, engage one on one.
The way you engage is by looking at the other person and hitting them with some words, affirmation or truth they don’t see.
It’s a verbal attack.
You look for imperfections or vulnerabilities and hit them with what you see.
You can say something like
“When I look at you, I feel this sense of …”
“The words you speak are …”
“I am so angry at you for …”
Here is the thing:
It doesn’t have to be true!
It can be irrational!
This is not about conflict resolution or non violent communication!
It can actually be verbally violent and aggressive!
You can take turns and speak for one minute each or you can go popcorn style and go with the flow of what comes.
Observe when you defend yourself, trying to apologize or hitting back with a new verbal punch.
It’s an art!
The more you practice the better you become!