It can be therapeutic, emotional release, trauma release, dearmoring, pleasure, energetic activation, sacred, sensual resensitizing, consciousness expansion, mystical journey, foreplay, etc.
Key questions to ask yourself:
- Is this simply a foreplay approach as lovers and you expect your partner to reciprocate?
- Are you holding sacred safe space for your lover?
- Are intentions clearly set?
- Is the flow simply spontaneous and casual with no structure or conscious intention set?
Depending on the intention, the quality and energy of the session will vary a lot.
The intention is set up through an initial 5-10 min interview with your lover.
Your lover might know exactly what they want.
If they don’t, you can suggest some ideas like, emotional release or pleasure to feel into what they respond to.
As a giver, it is essential to put possible personal agendas aside and really listen to your lover’s needs.
If the session is more casual, the intention and formality of the session can be totally or partially dropped to enter in a more free flow and spontaneous exploration.
- Stay present
- Hold space
- Focus on your lover’s agenda
- Create a safe space
- Cleanliness and hygiene
If you are simply casually sharing some yoni and lingam activation, the flow can of course be way more casual.
From a few minutes to 2 hours is possible.
If you have a 1 hour session here is what it could look like.
These are only suggestions, not a fixed format:
- 5 min – Check in – Intentions
- 5 min – Energy release – Shaking – Breathing – Movement
- 5 min – Body back massage
- 5 min – Body front massage – Trigger points
- 5 min – Genital area – Inner thighs – Outer lips – No penetration
- 30 min – Vaginal activation – Clitoral stimulation – Penetration
- 5 min – Soft releasing – Gently physically disconnecting
- 5 min – Still integration – No more touch – Let your lover go into their own space
- 5 min – Bring them back – Check in – Feedback
This is of course a free estimation with lots of possible variations.
This is a full session that can be shortened to way more targeted touch.
You can for instance have a 15 min SPOT YONI MASSAGE SESSION that is more focused on just internal vaginal activation.
A 15 min spot session might have 1 min for every stage instead of the 10 min I suggest in the timing above.
Spot sessions or shorter sessions are possible as well when you know each other already well.
You can jump right into it with less preparation.
You can use as well spot sessions as foreplay.
If you are new to YONI MASSAGE, it takes a few sessions to start being good at it.
You can be good from the start but the precision of your movement, timing, flow, presence are all developed with experience.
Try doing a few sessions with one lover.
One of the best ways to gain experience really fast is to have a few sessions with your lover in a month.
Giving sessions must become natural and easy for you.
Make eye contact during session.
Listen to and modulate the tone of your voice.
Be kind and gentle.
Receiving a yoni massage, especially for someone who is new to it can be quite deep. challenging and opening.
Create a safe space.
CLEAN ENERGETIC AND EMOTIONAL SPACE
Make sure you are in a positive and refreshing emotional space.
Your lover’s body is receptive to your emotions and touch.
Being in a clear emotional space is one of the greatest gifts you can offer.
EMOTIONAL RELEASE AND ENERGY ACTIVATION
A 5 min shaking, sound and breathing activation gets your lover to be in their body.
Make eye contact and check in verbally with your lover multiple times throughout the session for instant energetic feedback, possible targeted guidance, etc.
10 MIN STILL INTEGRATION
Give the your lover a few minutes of integration at the end.
This can be anywhere from 5 to 30 min or even more.
I gives them space to integrate.
The best way to learn massage and touch techniques is to take massage courses, watch videos and online courses, practice a lot with your lover as both giver and receiver, etc.
Touch is an art and an exploration.
Techniques are relatively simple but what makes you good at it is experience and practice.
Presence is another essential element to the quality of what you give.
I won’t go deep into detailed touch techniques in this short intro.
I will cover that in another detailed article.
Give attention to details and beauty:
- Clean sheets
- Small towel
- Silk sarong
You can bring sacredness in the form of mantras, chakra activation, intentions, creating sacred space, words, deep spiritual intentions, etc
HOW TO BE A GOOD GIVER
Take this example:
Who is a good kisser in your lovers or past relationships?
How did they become good kissers?
They are or became good kissers because they enjoy, are present, are creative, want to play and explore.
It’s all about the spirit rather than a given technique.
Techniques are important but they often naturally rise from the desire to experience and play.
I would say that being a good kisser comes at 90% from experience, playfulness, presence and at 10% from learned techniques.
Someone who is already a good kisser will naturally improve their skills by adopting a couple of new tricks.
You can apply the same ideas to yoni massage.
The first step is desire to explore, interest, curiosity, fun, intuition, creativity, etc.
Imagine giving a yoni massage and feeling uncomfortable or with the deep desire to actually be somewhere else.
Get the picture?
Techniques are important but represent only 20% of the session’s quality.
Probably 40% is experience and 40% real intense satisfaction, confidence and presence when being a giver.
Again take the example of someone who has very little experience with kissing.
With little experience or knowledge they might still be good because of presence and confidence.
If you never gave a yoni massage but feel super confident that you are naturally good at it, you might even be better than someone with more experience who is not really enjoying it.
Energetic transmission happens when you give a yoni massage.
You energetically connect with your lover.
This receiver feels your state of mind, intentions, emotions, confidence, presence, etc.
If you give a yoni massage and get distracted, your lover will feel it.
If you are in a good or bad mood, they will feel it too.
This idea of presence, confidence, being grounded and clear intentions are some of the essential aspects of being a good giver.
Add a few yoni massage techniques and you have the perfect alchemy.
YONI MASSAGE MISTAKES
These mistakes are for givers.
- Being forceful with a specific agenda
- Not being present
- Being stressed
- Being too mechanical in your touch
- Going too fast
- Not enjoying the session
- Being too vague with your touch
- Challenging with too intense touch without checking in with your lover first
- Not holding space when emotional release happens
- Poor hygiene in the space
- Poor personal hygiene
- No beauty in the space
- Not listening
- Disconnecting too fast at the end
- Not being open for feedback
- Disrespecting any of your lover’s boundaries
- Blaming or disrespecting your lover
- Using will power
- Not feeling the energies
- Not setting up a safe space
- Talking in technical jargon
- Not caring
- Forgetting the big picture
- Not holding clear energy
- Poor personal life higiene
- Projecting unresolved personal issues
- Spending too much time in preparation time
- Talking too much
These are ideas for follow up articles coming soon:
- SENSUAL RESENSITIZING
- TRAUMA RELEASE
- BASIC FEMALE GENITAL ANATOMY
- ORGASMIC WAVE
- PEAK ORGASM
- KUNDALINI RISING
- CHAKRA AWAKENING
- TRIGGER POINTS
- AFTER PEAK ORGASM
- CLITORIS ACTIVATION
- DIFFERENT TYPES OF TOUCH
- ANAL ZONE
- PUBIC BONE
- VAGINAL MAPPING
- RECEIVING FROM YOUR LOVER
- YONI MASSAGE TECHNIQUES
- YONI ESSENCE
- YONI IN THE HINDU TRADITION