DOUBLE STANDARDS / WOMEN TO MEN

1. EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS

• “I can be aggressive when I’m upset; it’s just how I express myself,” but if he shows anger, “You’re being threatening and aggressive.”

1. SOCIAL FLIRTING

• “It’s harmless when I flirt; it doesn’t mean anything,” yet if he flirts, “How could you disrespect me like that?”

1. USING DEROGATORY LANGUAGE

• “I can call you names when we argue because I’m just expressing my feelings,” but if he does, “That’s abusive and disrespectful.”

1. PUBLIC CRITICISM

• “I can criticize you in front of others; it’s just joking,” yet if he criticizes her, “You’re humiliating me publicly.”

1. PHYSICAL AGGRESSION

• “It’s not a big deal if I slap you; I’m a woman,” but if he reciprocates, “That’s abuse and unacceptable.”

1. JEALOUSY AND POSSESSIVENESS

• “I can go through your phone; I just want to make sure you’re faithful,” but if he does, “You’re controlling and invasive.”

1. CONTROLLING BEHAVIOR

• “I can dictate who you can see and talk to; it’s because I care,” but if he sets boundaries, “You’re being controlling.”

1. SEXUAL INITIATION

• “I can reject sex whenever I don’t feel like it,” but if he does, “What’s wrong with you? Don’t you find me attractive anymore?”

1. FINANCIAL EXPECTATIONS

• “You should spend money on me to show you care,” but if he expects the same, “You’re being materialistic and shallow.”

1. EMOTIONAL MANIPULATION
   • “I can give you the silent treatment to get what I want,” but if he does, “You’re being emotionally manipulative.”
2. DISPLAYS OF INSECURITY
   • “I can express my insecurities freely,” but if he does, “Stop being insecure and act like a man.”
3. PLAYING THE VICTIM
   • “I can act like the victim to gain sympathy,” but if he does, “You’re just trying to manipulate the situation.”
4. CHOOSING RELATIONSHIP PRIORITIES
   • “I decide what’s important for us to focus on in the relationship,” but if he does, “You’re not taking my needs into account.”
5. DEFLECTING BLAME
   • “It’s okay for me to blame you for our problems,” but if he does, “You never take responsibility for your actions.”
6. INVADING PRIVACY
   • “I can check your emails or texts; I have a right to know,” but if he does, “You’re violating my privacy.”
7. WITHHOLDING AFFECTION AS PUNISHMENT
   • “I can withhold affection when I’m mad at you,” but if he does, “You’re being cold and punitive.”
8. SELECTIVE COMMUNICATION
   • “I can ignore your calls or texts when I’m upset,” but if he does, “You’re neglecting the relationship.”
9. TAKING CARE OF PERSONAL APPEARANCE
   • “I can comment on how you should dress or groom,” but if he does, “Don’t try to control how I look.”
10. SETTING RELATIONSHIP BOUNDARIES
    • “I can set the rules for our relationship,” but if he does, “You’re being unreasonable and oppressive.”
11. RESOLVING CONFLICTS
    • “I can walk away from an argument whenever I want,” but if he does, “You’re just avoiding our problems and not facing them.”

These examples delve into the intricacies of romantic relationships, highlighting behaviors and attitudes that might be socially tolerated or excused for women but deemed inappropriate or unacceptable for men. Recognizing and addressing these double standards is crucial for healthy, balanced relationships based on mutual respect and understanding.