Based on the list of communication challenges from your workshop participants, we can group them into several key categories. These categories will help in addressing and developing strategies for each type of communication issue.

  1. Clarity and Articulation:
  • Clarity
  • Being too Direct
  • Truth sharing
  1. Listening and Understanding:
  • Active listening
  • Not being heard
  • Creating stories (assuming this refers to assuming or fabricating stories about what the other person means)
  1. Emotional Regulation and Response Control:
  • Staying centered and calm
  • Triggered responses
  • Trigger regulation
  • Being reactive
  • Reactive responses
  • Shutting down
  1. Conflict Management:
  • Difficult conversations
  • Conflict avoidance
  • Deflection
  • Defensive reactions
  1. Consistency and Reliability:
  • Inconsistency
  • Being head-trapped (assuming this refers to overthinking or inconsistency in thought vs. action)
  1. Self-Awareness and Boundaries:
  • People pleasing
  • Power loss
  • Boundaries

These categories can be a framework for developing targeted strategies and exercises in your coaching sessions. They encompass the core areas of communication challenges and provide a structured way to approach and address them.


Certainly, here’s a raw list of common communication challenges that couples often face:

  1. Misunderstandings: Misinterpreting each other’s words or intentions.
  2. Lack of Openness: Not being open or honest about feelings or thoughts.
  3. Poor Listening Skills: Not listening attentively or empathetically.
  4. Avoidance of Sensitive Topics: Avoiding discussions about certain sensitive or uncomfortable topics.
  5. Non-Verbal Miscommunication: Misreading body language, tone of voice, or facial expressions.
  6. Overreacting or Hyper-Sensitivity: Becoming overly emotional or sensitive during discussions.
  7. Passive-Aggressive Behavior: Indirectly expressing negative feelings instead of openly addressing them.
  8. Unresolved Past Conflicts: Bringing up past issues instead of focusing on the current discussion.
  9. Time Management: Struggling to find time for meaningful conversations.
  10. Cultural or Linguistic Differences: Challenges arising from differing cultural backgrounds or language barriers.
  11. Failure to Acknowledge Effort: Not recognizing or appreciating the other’s efforts in communication or relationship building.
  12. Assuming Instead of Asking: Making assumptions about each other’s thoughts or feelings instead of asking directly.
  13. Technology Interference: Allowing technology (phones, TV, etc.) to interrupt or distract from communication.
  14. Fear of Vulnerability: Hesitancy to be vulnerable and open about personal fears, desires, or weaknesses.
  15. Projection: Projecting one’s own feelings or insecurities onto the partner.
  16. Gaslighting: Manipulating the partner to question their own reality or feelings.

This list includes a broad range of communication issues that couples may encounter. Comparing this with the list from your workshop might reveal additional areas or nuances in communication challenges specific to your audience.

How thE Raw 16 poinT list Compares with the one at my workshop?

When comparing the list of communication challenges I provided with the synthesized categories from your workshop, several similarities and differences stand out:


  1. Emotional Regulation and Response Control: Both lists highlight issues like being reactive, managing triggers, and staying calm. This emphasizes the importance of emotional control in communication.
  2. Listening and Understanding: Challenges like active listening and not being heard are common in both lists, underlining the importance of effective listening in relationships.
  3. Conflict Management: Both lists touch on handling difficult conversations, avoiding conflict, and dealing with defensive reactions.
  4. Clarity and Articulation: The need for clear communication and truth-sharing is a common theme.
  5. Boundaries and Self-Awareness: Issues like setting boundaries and managing tendencies like people-pleasing appear in both lists.


  1. Misunderstandings and Assumptions: Your list doesn’t explicitly mention misunderstandings or assumptions, which are common in many relationships.
  2. Avoidance of Sensitive Topics: This specific challenge is not directly addressed in your list but is a frequent issue in couple dynamics.
  3. Non-Verbal Miscommunication: The role of non-verbal cues in misunderstandings is not explicitly mentioned in your list.
  4. Technology Interference: The impact of technology on communication is a modern challenge that didn’t appear in your workshop list.
  5. Cultural or Linguistic Differences: This specific challenge, which can be significant in some relationships, wasn’t noted in your workshop feedback.

The comparison reveals that while there are many common threads in communication challenges, certain aspects like the impact of technology, cultural differences, and non-verbal cues might be additional areas to explore in your workshops. It also underscores the complexity of communication in relationships and the diverse range of issues couples may face.

About the author

Shiva Rajaya

Tantrika / Life coach / Activator of new evolutionary codes for the planet and humankind